Expect kids to fight: Make sure they never fight

There are certain negative things that you need to know about having a home. Whether you have a child, children, no child or not even married yet, fighting is inevitable amongst kids. Before we go into that, let’s start with reasons why kids will fight.

Figure 1: The fight development cycle amongst kids:

From the figure above, it can be seen that kids can fight for both positive and negative reasons and the explanations of reasons why they fight are:

Power struggle – just like adults, kids also want to showcase that they are stronger and better than their counterparts, and this will normally results in exchange of physical blows.

Low EI – EI basically means emotional intelligence, and low EI means that they don’t have a clear understanding of the emotions of others; in that case they can’t really tell when their actions is making others angry, which can result in the angered person pushing forward for a fight.

Family training – some kids are natural bullies. They have been purely trained from homes and tend to exercise high level of physical power against their fellow kids. These kinds of kids normally come from poor background such as the GANGSTA Hood where violence is very come and they have learned to live that kind of life. As such, they can easily engage in fighting because they tend to view it as the ultimate solution to any problem.

Defense – from the three descriptions presented above, the focus has been on the offender but, the focus in terms of defense is on the offended. When kids are being beaten up, they can easily revert to fighting as a form of defense against their offenders.

On that account, you should expect the kids to fight but you should not let them fight. As such, what are the necessary measure that should be taken when you see kids nearing “fighting point” or “already fighting”. The measures are discussed below.

Separation – the first and foremost thing you should do is get them separated. Put them in different positions where they will not be able to hit each other quickly.

Calm them down – once separated, calm the kids down and let the fighting spirit move out of their soul. This can be done by simply pleading with them or wowing them with gifts if you care to do so.

Advise the kids – now they are all relaxed out right. Ok, begin the final step of advising them on the negative aspect of fighting and why they should never fight again. You can highlight issues such as letting them know that they can injure their selves, it is against the law, it is not good of a child, and it is against God’s teachings.

Finally, get the kids to shake each other or hug each other. Once they are back to their normal selves, initiate a new trend of friendship in the kids by getting them to hug each other or shake hands. Now you see that you should expect kids to fight right? But you should make sure they never fight.

Happy parenting!!!